O.K….here’s my take on all the Grey’s Anatomy drama recently. I used to watch Grey’s religiously, I never missed an episode during the first few years. I loved the music, the characters, the heartwrenching storylines, the quotes, oh how I loved the quotes (If you will look back, a Grey’s quote is how I began my first entry in this blog) When Meredith announced that Christina was “her person” I had to have a person too! Over time, I lost interest and quit watching.
Last week all of the “Dr. Shephard death” posts on facebook caught my eye and peaked my interest. I watched the episode online and did the whole ugly cry thing. The bf (let’s call him Anton from here on out) looked over and said “Are you really crying from a T.V. show?” My reply, “Yesssss sniff, sniff” I then explained, he was her love, her one true love, he was the one for her, her one big, huge, love of her life. They fought so hard along the way to be together and they made it work. They made it to their happy ending. And now he’s gone. What is she supposed to do?? I feel that, I have finally found my big, true love with Anton and to lose him now would be unimaginable. So, yes…I cried…hard! He consoled me, unjudging, and without laughing.
This week, we watched the 2 hour episode that showed everyone else’s reaction to the death of McDreamy. Several things about the episode have stayed in my mind throughout the weekend. First, how the death of someone close to you causes everyone to stop and take a long look at their own life and how they are living it. And deciding to make the necessary changes to live life to it’s abosolute fullest potential. They say I Love You more than they did before, they don’t take the little things for granted, they wake up each morning ready to face the day and whatever it may offer. I know I felt these very same things when I lost my Daddy last year. It proved just how short life is to me. I just find it sad that it takes us losing someone to bring out this reaction. We should have been living our lives this way for years.
Another part of the episode that stayed with me is Dr. Baileys reaction. Even when I go over it now in my head, tears come to my eyes. Dr. Bailey explained to her man how with her ex husband she could imagine him being gone, and knew she would be O.K. But with him, he is such a part of her, that when she imagines something happening to him, she can’t see herself ever being O.K. “I love you too much” she says. I so feel this. I have a somewhat morbid mind I guess. I would imagine something happening to my ex (both of them) , and I was always o.k. afterwards. But with Anton, when I think of such things, it gets hard to breathe. He is a piece of me. I can’t go on if he’s not here beside me. He doesn’t believe in fate or soulmates, I really don’t either…..however, something brought us together. Our paths crossed in an unconventional way, at just the right time in both of our lives for some reason. We both lost a parent within 2 months of knowing each other, we were there for each other and helped each other feel the huge void that was missing in our lives. My life has changed so greatly in so many positive ways since Anton came into my life. I am holding on tight and never letting him go!